Thanks for your reply St. John Wort. I am scare of making mistakes. I've seen my sister fail at both her marriage and career. She was a violinist in an orchestra at school. She was dating a guy who wanted to go into medecine. He dumped her and went for a women who was in nursing. My sister was crushed and almost commited suicide...but my parents had her stomach pumped. My sister got married really young...I guess because she was afraid. She ended up on welfare and is divorced with three children. I don't want to end up the same way. My mom always said it was because she didn't feel like working....I don't believe this is true. I felt my sister could ahve done lots of things with her life. I thought she was smart funny and beautiful...and she is...she was working as a nurse for people with mental disabilities. I mean...I think my mom was too hard on her...I don't want to end up the same way. I don't want my bf to leave me because I'm not like him...or because I'm not good enough...I think this has relaly traumatized me