(((((((((((((myoasis89)))))))))))) You say that you know a lot of people will hate you for what you have done---I would like to hope that we here at pc are different than that. People can hate what you've done without hating you. My opinion is we are here to offer support and advice, not judgement. You have enough on your mind, try to let this worry go.

Your feelings seem to be all over the place, from not being able to stand this guy to friendship to trying to transpose your feelings for your bf on him. Have you ever spent time looking at why you cheated on your ex? If this seems a pattern with you, there may be a reason, something in your past. You have a couple things going for you in trying to resolve this from happening again: You are aware of the damage this causes, you feel bad about it. There is no doubt that your bf will be hurt; I know that's not what you want to hear, but it is a result of what happened. If he is back from Iran, the mature thing to do is to sit down with him and talk to him (mature--yes...easy--no). If this truly is something you regret and don't want to ever happen again, I think it would be beneficial to tell this other guy the truth--you regret what happened and it will never happen again. There is no way to predict what will happen with your bf, you are aware you broke a serious trust with him. Honesty and asking for forgiveness (and forgiveness may not come easy). I urge you to look further into the why of this--discuss it with a t if you have one.

I'm sorry you are distraught over this, it's hard when the decisions we make are ones that are painful for us and others. Unfortunatley I have been in your bf shoes (only I was married). One important thing is that once you have talked to your bf and/or reflected on why you do this repeatedly, forgive yourself (that doesn't mean being ok with it, it means accepting the fault and recognizing it was wrong and still loving yourself, knowing you human with human fallibles). I wish you well.