If it's any consolation I often feel the same way - if I could only step outside myself things would be okay. But of course there is no way out. I sometimes wonder if this desire is what leads to the depersonalisation issues that some of us experience.

But ultimately the desire to escape oneself is the desire for a shortcut. And shortcuts often lead to an unstatisfying sense of achievement - like missing the big picture in a race to see the detail. Whilst I do not know, for I am very far from there, I work on the assumption that the longhand route will be the way to happiness. For example, medication may give you momentary and artificial relief fairly quickly, but the far more onerous task of therapy will provide the lasting results you require.

Very best of luck to you, and remember you are not alone

UM