Welcome to pc. As capp has said, there is a Men Focused Group and a Sexual Issues Group as well.

If you have been together 7 years, did you just now start wondering was out there? I also wonder what is it hat made her look through your sent emails? That's not something that is normally done when there is trust. Another question to think about is once you saw "what was out there", what were your plans with it?

Is very brave of you to acknowledge your mistake and to want help for it. I have no magic answer for how long to wait to contact her. Have you thought about writing a letter and mailing it to her? Reassure her that it was your (excuse me, please don't get mad) stupidity and not anything missing in her or missing in your relationship. Let her know that it was a case of "cold feet" not "cold heart", that you do still love her and you are (hopefully soon) going to talk to a therapist about why you did this. I know you think she is mad at you--and she probably is--but remember her heart is breaking, too. Please be gentle with yourself, gentle with her and honest with both yourself and her. Continue posting here if you feel comfortable. You will find pc to be a warm and caring place, non-judgemental is how we all try to be. Check out the forums and message a community liaison if you have any questions.