Oh sweety!!! I am so sorry. You have to be hurting so much right now! Is there any chance you two can meet face to face instead of online? Then you can read emotions, he can see how much he means to you and you can see that you are still important to him. Is there any chance that he has something major going on in his life right now so that he can't respond to you in a gentle and caring way?

You aren't stupid, you aren't!

He knows you have a hard time trusting--does he know why? If he doesn't have something going on in his own life right now, maybe he is frustrated at not being able to help you. You've known him for 7 years, he obviously cares a great deal about you and it's hard on us watching someone we care about hurt and not be able to help them. It is possible he just let his frustration with himself overflow to you. Please don't totally give up on a 7 year friendship. Those are hard to get over. I know he said some very, very hurtful things. Please know that you aren't lame--you are taking care of yourself, acknowledging your own issues, things you need to work on and that is mature, not lame.