Will,

This story sounds so familier to me. When I was in 10th grade there was this boy named, well, we will just call him T. Since the first moment I laid eyes on him I just got weak in the knees. He was so, so , so , so Beautiful. As perfect as another human being can be. Over time, I interacted with T. We hung out in basically the same crowd. He was always very nice to me and he was plenty aware of my feelings. Months and months I spent chasing after this boy. Finally part of me just had to let go. Nothing was going to come of it so I needed to move on. So, who better to go out with then his best friend, J. Remember, I was in high school so this is obviously very immature behavior. Anyway, J and I went out one night to the movies and then hung out at a mutual friends house. Word got back to T and the very next morning I got a call from T asking me why I would do that. I was confused because T never wanted a relationship with me so why was he calling me? Anyway, I didnt talk to T for a good many years. A friend and I ran into T and it was like all those feelings I had were back again. He and I were much more mature now and I thought, what good timing. T and I hung out all the time again. One night we shared a special kiss that I will never forget. To this day I can still remember how that kiss felt and it was the most amazing kiss I have ever had. Things never worked out for T and I. Eventually, I met my current hubby and have been together for 10 years and married for 5.
I guess sometimes, in life, we are lucky enough to meet such special people and never really cam let go. I mean, I still think about T now. Now in the way that I used to but I certainly care. Sometimes, we have to just move on. Even though our heart aches, we must accept the the other person is either not ready or does not feel the same way. It's one of the hardest lessons I've ever had to learn and one of the most painful. I understand your feelings and your not alone.