Hi Eva -- I understand what you mean @ the "looking great" thing.

I was a very shy, inexperienced, unworldly, bookish 16-year-old who "looked great." It was bewildering and scarey when men stared, came on to me, catcalled, etc. I didn't get it. I was still a child in my mind.

I was probably in my 30s before I got comfortable with me looks. Now, post menopause, sometimes I miss it and to look younger. But I know what ails me is really inside -- the anxiety, the depression, the not feeling good in my skin -- not what the old "skin bag" looks like.

So sorry you've hit a rough patch. Hope you will feel better soon.