SO I had a good session with T , sorted out a lot of things - felt good afterwards - still a bit confused - but good. Acutally had an afternoon when I had no SI of SH thoughts!
almost felt safe for the first time in a long time, maybe thats why.....
Today, the thoughts are back
I guess this is what happens? at least I had half a day without them !
see there is hope
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts 
its how many times you get back up! 
(Thanks to fenrir for my Picture 
)
When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown,
Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly.
by Patrick Overton, author and poet