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so much rage has been building, never allowed anger, programmed to do whatever, whenever and not show the feelings or it got worse. my belief in God saved me from suicide but i was taught a lot of mistaken ideas about God and how i must not be angry with God because nothing is His fault. that is true, but that doesn't help a small child cope with massive injustice and cruelty.
thanks for the encouragement sabby, i know you care.
twilight, thank you too, invisibility while hurting is agony to me. i hope i can call my T today on sunday is bad day to interrupt her life. i find it so hard to ask for one inch outside the box of our time.
in a weird way i'm encouraged - now that i am past the raging, i've needed to let this out for so long, its been killing me inside.
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  HEALING HAPPENS
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