I can understand that your brother has triggered in you contradictory feelings and you are kind of lost in knowing if he really professes you brotherly love. I personally think that your brother is abussive towards you and this is not the right way to love someone. This applies at all levels: your mother, your father, boyfriend, friends or whoever... And I don't think he has a tetosterone problem, i think it's something more deep that he can't control anymore. Of course, the ideal thing is that your parents try to stop this attitude he has with you, either talking with him or other measures...But if they don't do this it is quite difficult. You are going to have to keep out of his way if you can't make him consciouss of his abuse. If possible, could you live in separate homes? Maybe you should find a way to be separate(be diplomatic but steady). Try to explain to your parents why you want to separate from him so they take it seriously because it can really affect you. It is logical for you to feel kind of lost in how to love your brother. i have a brother, and yes, we used to fight alot when we were small but my mother would always separate us, she never let us cross the line. I remeber when my brother was a toddler, he's three yrs younger than I am, and he had a biting problem. He bit me so hard one time he left his teeth marks on my arm! Yeah, he was a toddler, but my mother ran over and smacked him on the mouth(sometimes it is necessary); I think he never did it again... Anyway when we were both older, maybe I was 15, we got into this fight and he punched me in the eye so hard it was purple the next day. My God, i cried all night, I was petrified. The next day he was totally embarassed, and he said he was really sorry. Never again did anyhting of that sort happen. And I have to say I kind of pinched him when we were fighting and I made him really mad. My father was there when he punched me, and he grabbed my brother really hard that time. I think my brother will never forget that also. We never talk about it because it was clear that he was sorry and I was also. I gather that your brother can't control his frustration or whatever and he puts it on you. This is a big mistake because soon it turns into an abussive way to deal with frustration. And I know it really hurts because it's your BROTHER and u truelly love him. So caution, next time try to make him relax or be consciouss of what he is doing or saying... It's not your fault. Good luck, rap