I just got an email from her that was a bit confusing. Here is a lil bit from there.

You say the Firebird was an accomplishment.... Your marriage to your wife should have been your accomplishment. To be married to me, and not to sound too vain (I think everyone should be to a degree) but I'm a pretty DAMN good catch. It should have made you think "this women unlike no other makes me happy and does something to me that elevates me further than I could have ever imagine". Plus any man who would catch my attn strongly enough to marry would be the luckist man alive for me to say yes. THats why for the longest time I thought "Why the hell would you put a car in frount of me on your list of priorities?!"

You mentioned in the Blog on myspace if people change. You want me to change back into the person you married. The housewife. But thing is... I did change.... but not into someone you want me to be. I've come to realized I was, and still am, a broken soul. I still have parts of me that need to be mended fixed and replaced even. Like your firebird. But I need to fix it on my own. Its one car that you can't buy parts for, or even tune easily and I don't know how long it'll take. But once I'm fixed, atleast it'll benefit me as oppose to work against me. The firebird won't make you better. But fixing yourself will always make you better. I know your doing great on working on yourself and I see that but the damaged done to me (NOT INFLICTED BY YOU) has caused serious repercussion in our marriage. So like you said the foundation wasn't strong to hold us up. Your had your foundation and there were some cracked but mine was all gone to hell. I really didn't have a good one at all.

What I'm trying to say is that if we were to come back together one day, I want to make sure I'm not broken or damaged in any way. I need to fix my foundation. You need to go out and date....You need to experiance new situations with relationships. See, I've been in all kinds of relationships, long distance, abusive, been cheated on, lied to, ****ed over, used, pysically and finacially. I've never experiaced the world. Never traveled anywhere and even partied. You on the other hand have traveled, partied and seen the world. But have not had any relationships.

I've never lived on my own to experiace all that away from mommy and daddy. Thats why a lot of things are confusing right now. And I think its transitional thing I need to go though and to take responsiblity for my own actions. As you did in the Marine Corps.




Now thats what she wrote....she started off saying she was a pretty DAMN good catch yet she was broken and her past casued alot of problems in our marriage.....doesnt that contradict itself?

It sounds like she misses the single life and sounds like she regrets not being single. Or does anybody think I am taking it the wrong way??

She also talked about relationships, long distance, abusive, been cheated on, lied to, ****ed over, used, pysically and finacially......other than being used physically, she has done all of that to me. Granted she was the first REAL girlfriend I ever had, but i look at it like this- I went from playing high school football to the NFL. I know I made my mistakes in the marriage, we all do. I'm not saying I am an MVP or anything, but I held my own. I don't think me being not as experienced in relationships hindered the marriage.....or am i missing something?