At the risk of sounding unsupportive, based on your other threads you tell him you want him to be honest with you but you also say you don't want to hear it. I'm sure he's trying to walk a fine line. Although I have to say I wouldn't be happy to discover that my husband looked up old girlfriends online.

Men and women communicate differently. Most men (trying to be pc here) are perfectly happy to avoid those in-depth conversations. In the early days of my marriage I found myself starting fights because after the fights were usually the only time we had those in depth soul-searching all-night conversations. My own husband has the philosophy if it's isn't broke don't fix it.

I know I'm going to get a lot of grief for this, but you've really got to pick your battles. If everything under the sun turns into a fight he's just not going to even try anymore. If you don't think he's doing anything wrong, then concider why this bothers you so much. Just because you are very open with him does not mean he's going to respond in turn. I've known my husband since I was 6 and he was 8 and I'm STILL finding things out about him I didn't know.

I think you really need to spend some time thinking about which issues are yours alone and which are yours as a couple. If he's never given you any reason to make you distrust him and you still don't trust him that's your issue and frankly there's not a thing he could do to change that. It's something you have to work on.

You've mentioned that he's hurt you in several threads. From what you've posted he's said things that bothered you. There is a big difference between being insensitive and hurtful. If I say that red dresses are the ugliest things I've ever seen and your favorite dress happens to be red, I didn't say it to hurt your feelings. If it does, you need to own that and realize I'm not going to change my opinion just because it hurts your feelings.

Most men cannot comprehend our thought process. The don't understand our need to break things down to their most basic level and dwell on them. He's never going to be your best girlfriend. As my Aunt used to say you can't turn a sow's ear into a silk purse. As yourself why you married him, what was it about him that attracted you to him to begin with. Are those qualities still there? Do you spend time thinking not only of the things that upset you in your marriage but those things that make you very happy? If the only thing you're looking for is trouble, that's all you're going to find.

I'm certainly not saying stick your head in the clouds and ignore the things going on around you. But you've got to find some middle ground. Fighting is the least productive thing in the world. Try taking a breath and discussing it later when you're more calm. Ask yourself how important this is, will it matter in five years? Really think about what your ideal marital situation would be, is that idea realistic? How can you and he come to a compromise that you can both live with and feel fullfilled?