dear possum,

i forgive you for not being completely honest, you made a choice you feel bad about. i have many of those. we all hurt so much inside that any good experience where we feel healthy and able to help is so important to us.

so, let me get honest. i went to the dentist and got a root canal in an abscessed tooth. i cried and went home and took tylenol with codein and it did not work at all and the pain was so bad. i ended up over a 5 hour period using 7 vicodin and total 5 aspirin, an icebag and i still do hurt. i feel guilty for exceeding dosages, but i did not seek to get high, i just got so scared by the intensity of pain. i still hurt but the edge of pain has dulled a bit. i do not feel even a bit "altered" by the medicine. one of the miserys of being did/mpd is that i do not respond easily to medicine. i want to cry but i hurt too much to let myself cry and hurt more.

so maybe you will forgive me for being less than i wish i was on this forum and in my life.

i do not believe you "needed" my forgiveness, i just offered it to let you know i understand where you are and i care about you and hope things will resolve some and give you release of the pain and any guilt.

we all are more frail than we wish to admit. hugs to you, possum!!!

leslie and kiki