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soalone,
you are in the right place. many here have had some really rough patches too and we will understand you and support you as well. all my situations are different from yours but pain and fear are also universal and i can understand.
are you looking for comfort or comfort and ideas on how to cope???
as far as comfort goes, folks just offer their support and they share where they've gotten their own hope and help. and sometimes they just share adorable pictures that make you smile.
i don't know what to say in comfort about your mom's behavior. i'm guessing she must be addicted to gambling. i would be so upset if a family member did something like that to me - especially when i am searching for a job. it is completely crazy when a parent starts being like an irresponsible child!!!
on a practical note, there are tons of fantastic websites on how to save money, get out of debt and manage life with thrift and style both. (about.com/frugal has huge resources; living on a dime.com is another that is great) websites like these can save you thousands of dollars. and also there are support groups out there somewhere to help you deal with your mom's addiction and its effects on you - CoDa is really great)
i talk to God and practice my faith - i say practice cos i sure don't do it perfectly! as soon as life gets tough i remember how much i need God's help.
well, i'm about talked out here. i hope you gain some encouragement. i know you are worried but i am pretty sure something will work out for you. try to keep going with long walks and healthy eating to keep the good health you were obtaining. please get on a local crisis line or online when or if you hear those bad thoughts of ending your life. suicide is a permanent end to a temporary problem!!! you do have too much to live for to end your life. AND....
for Pete's Sake, if you have a master's in education YOU ARE NEEDED!!!! all over the US and many foreign countries they have a desperate need for teachers - that means YOU!!!!!!!!!!
you did a smart thing writing in to us. just be patient and keep posting because we do care!!!
leslie
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  HEALING HAPPENS
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