((((((((((((((((((((((((sitting)))))))))))))))))))))))))

Wow, so many wise and thoughtful replies, I don't even know what to add!!

I do agree with sunny....without working on it consciously, I think my insides and my outsides are starting to line up a little bit more....and I am starting to learn who I actually AM inside....so many years of having to "pretend" does leave us sort of guessing what is real and what isn't.

You are asking big, thoughtful questions, and you are working so hard.

I guess all I can really add is a lot of well-deserved because no matter what layer of the onion you are on, we can see that you are a beautiful and kind and lovable person.