Hello Tmac, I am glad you have joned us here at PC, many people will understand and you won't feel so alone.

I'm sorry you have been through so much and you were assaulted. I hope the person that did that to you was put away.

I feel it would be good for you to seek therapy to deal with that trauma and the other stuff you keep stuffing away, and in the meantime we are here supporting you. Welcome!