yes, thanks imapatient. im feeling pretty good now, actually.

after posting here i think i went to sleep for another 6hrs, lol. these drugs take a lot of time to get out of the system! i feel a lot calmer and in control now that i know i can make it through the nights ok.

i made a promise to pdoc that i would see him on monday, and i don't break promises. so sui is not an imminent threat. but something really will have to change quick fast if i'm going to have to keep postponing it. i know pdoc wants me to change my meds, but apparently that can't happen overnight because blood tests and stuff will need to be involved. so it looks like i'm going to have to battle on for a few more weeks before things even start to get better .

thank you all so much for your support, guys. apart from pdoc and grandparents last night, this is the only contact i've had with anyone for the week, and i really need people when i get down.