i could really relate to the part where you said you worried a lot. i used to not be able to stop the repititious thought/worrying. it consumed me. sometimes now something will trigger that worrying. it's usually for me when i think someone is mad at me for something i've done or not done and they are unhappy with me...or reject me..what i do now tho is realize i have no control of others and how they feel or perceive things. that realization has helped me a lot. yeah, i still worry over things but i do try to divert that worrying into a fruitful task...like mopping the floor,taking a brisk walk, helping someone else. that takes the focus off me.
as for the "abuse" you mentioned, i was physiclly and emotionally abused. i don't feel either is worse than the other. i can say this with conviction since i experienced both. i can also relate to doing everything humanly possible to not piss off my abuser. and you're right, it doesn't always work out to avoid being abused. i felt like i was walking on egg shells all of the time. i'm glad you are free of that situation. no one deserves to be abused for any reason at all. imho, if one feels abused, then they probably are.