I have to say, this is a really amazing thread. I'm going to write some of these reasons down in a notebook to carry around
What stops me is knowing my best friend will be able to tell what I've done. He's the only person in the world who knows about my SI and he's done his best to love and help me. I know how much my SI hurts him and I can't bear to disappoint him after all he's done for me. Knowing that he cares and that he believes in me keeps me holding on.