Well, I screwed up this morning...

I'm a seeker of love, meaning that I like to be held, cuddled, kissed, etc., and this morning when I got rudely awakned by our dog waking our baby, after putting him back down, I went downstairs and she walked right bye me. I didn't go off, but I pouted, she did finally ask what was wrong and I told her, and I was upset, not angry, but upset, when I told her, so you know my tone wasn't the best . I am a very insecure person and this kinda thing scares me, I wonder what she's thinking, like "what an idiot", "he did it again!"...*sigh*

Afterward I felt horrible. I know she's not a "morning person", and I really wasn't awake. I was upset that she didn't come straight to me and hug me and kiss me good morning, but she's not that way in the first place (love seeker, as I am), and in the second place, again, she's not a morning person.

I gave it a few minutes than ran upstairs before she jumped in the shower and profusely apologized, and she said it's alright, but really it wasn't (not in my mind). She was sincere and understanding, thank God, but I worry that I'll keep doing this. It's really hard to give her space when I just want to be with her and hold her all the time. *SIGH*...I don't wanna mess this up, but I get so frustrated. I don't know how to stop these feelings, I don't want them to stop, I love her deeply. Grrr, dunno what to do.