What is love, to you?

I asked my wife if she could say she was in love with me. She had told me a while back she wasn't in love, but loved me. To me, there is no difference, but, let me explain my thoughts...

1. "In love?" - Consumed by the person - First stages of a relationship, all you can do is think about that person, what they are doing, do they miss you as much as you miss them, the passion is overwhelming, all you want is to be with that person and nothing else matters. I call this the pine fire phase...why? Pine lights fast, but it burns fast too. This all consuming feeling will soon wane, it doesn't last forever, it's, imho, impossible for it to last forever, it's the newness stage and it goes away. This is where I feel most people fail at understanding real love. This is where you feel you have fallen in "in love" with someone, when it's actually a stage all good realtionships go through (even some bad ones I am sure). Lust has a big part to play here as well, feels like you're in love, but that all consuming fire will soon die down...where we fall into #2.

2. This is what I call the burning oak stage, or a higher love. The "in love, all consuming, newness of the relationship" is gone, but the love you now have IS true love. You have reached a higher love, where you accept the faults you didn't even notice at the beginning of the relationship. You accept them, and look past them. Some times you become complacent, not good, need to keep things going...communitcation is key. But that newness feeling, the pine fire phase is gone. You realize you have a life, work, friends, maybe kids now...you are comfortable around you significant other, he or she is your best friend, and you do things for him or her that you just wouldn't do for other people, because you love them. Here is where I find "in love" and "I love you", synonomous. You have been through the pine fire, and now your love is there, burning slowly, but burning, not gone. Reality hit you and you're now living your life with your significant other as a part of that life, not ... how do I say this, your significant other isn't all of your life, all consuming...anymore, but that's ok, it doesn't mean you don't love that person, it means you realize who that person is, you love them, and you live your life with them, and to some extent yeah, for them, but not like before. This is a higher love, a truer love, a deeper love.

So, that is my opinion, what do you all think?