i'm sorry you are feeling the way you do. depression can make us see ourselves in a bleak way. i certainly don't think you are worthless and i don't hate you. matter of fact i care very much about you and how you are feeling. 
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Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.
The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand
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