Do you ever feel like you are in a huge hole? You reach up and grab the edges to pull yourself out but it just gives way. You stand there with the crumbled dirt in you hand and think will I ever be able to pull myself out. What makes that hole even worse is while standing in there trying to figure out how you will make it there are others throwing shovels full of dirt in on you. Better yet they have no idea they are burying you and have no idea thats where you are because you have no voice. How about when you find that voice and you are afraid to speak up because you have been sucked in so deep you don't want anyone to know for fear of being judged.

I guess the best way to say it is your are in a black hole and can't get out. You don't want others to know for fear of riducule and judging. What is even worse when others do not understand and tell you to just get over whats bothering you. I guess I am not sure which is worse beign depressed or others know you are depressed or the people who don't even care. I guess I am just trying to vent out of frustration more than anything. Because being in this hole SUCKS! I wish getting over it were that simple. I get more angry and frustrated with myself for being where I am because I don't like where am and nothing I do seems to help.