it doesn't sound like your daughter has low self-esteem..it sounds like she's learned how to get your attention and push all of your buttons about promptness and school. can you get her full attention if you sit down to her level and talk to her? and, this is important, have you talked to her teacher and/or the principal to find out if there is anything untowards happening on their end? maybe a bully.... before i'd put her in a certain box, i'd do some real detective work and try to find out what's causing this and then what you can do to help her through it. pat