I am so sorry you are having a difficult time. I managed to block out my childhood memories for 25 years. Somehow, I managed to keep them away, until I was at a time in my life when I was ready to deal with them. I am now understanding why I have suffered extreme anxiety all of my life. I have been seeing a therapist for 3 years, and it has been the hardest journey of my life. The flashbacks and memories are unfortunately a part of the healing, that seems we all have to go through. I know that nights are the worst. I wish I could tell you its a quick fix, but it isnt. I can tell you though, that you must have patience with yourself and trust in your therapist. When I look back 3 years, I know I have come a long way, and I truly believe it will all be worth it in the end. You are not alone in your struggle.........there are many who understand. Hang in there.......Take care......L