I know, I know I do.. I guess i just feel so undeserving of the help

because I'm wasting peoples' time? I don't knmow
I know I need to see my dr, he cares.. I saw one of my old counsellors today and I o wanted to just blub my face off to her, but i just smiled.. I wish we'd spoken a little.. But we were both shopping.
My arm's bandaged from ym hand to my elbow.. So i can't do it to the same arm again.. But I'm planning to do it again on the other arm :S I only know that because earlier I picked up the blades to move them, thought about throwing them in the bin, then though 'No.. I'll be needing them later'.. What if I get sectioned or something? Oh God.. i don't know whart to do and now I'm panicking whichj means I;'ll dissociate if I'm not carefu;