I've been suffering from depression for quite a while now. I finally got myself to the docs in May and she gave me some anti d's which have slowly started to help. I've also just started seeing a counsellor. I was doing well, taking all the advice, working everything through but now I can feel myself sliding back down that slippery slope. I can't be bothered with anything, I'm snapping at my family. I can see my husband look at me and think 'not again'. I know it's happening, but I can't do anything about it. I feel useless again and don't even want to try and tell anyone, why would they listen. I don't remember things and I'm forever locking myself out cos I haven't got my keys, forgetting the girls dinner money. I'm just bloody useless and frustrated that I can't do anything about it, I've tried all my coping mechanisms. I'm forty on Saturday and just keep wondering what I've done with all this time. My two little girls are amazing but I feel like that is just in spite of me, when I want it to be because of me.

Sorry for the rant but I've got to let it out somewhere.