(((notme9)))
I have not read Briere, but I am definitely going to check it out. I have read a bunch of other books, articles, theories in an attempt to understand not only what I was experiencing but what the heck was supposed to happen in therapy.
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This discussion was huge to me, explained what the theoretical purpose of the therapy relationship was supposed to be. Before I was just doing it, blindly; now I have an idea of what it's supposed to accomplish and how.
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From a physical point of view, this has recently been confirmed with the discovery of 'mirror neurons' in our brains. These neurons only fire not only when we are doing something, but when we observe someone else authentically doing something.
In the therapeutic sense, I think that when T is authentically showing me kindness (for example), it allows my brain to learn how to 'fire' and feel that kindness for myself.
Knowing there is scientific evidence that supports therapy helped me a lot to really commit to the process. It also explains *why* the therapeutic relationship is such a vital part of the healing -- if T is not being authentic, or if the connection isn't there, then our brains are not firing those mirror neurons.
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In fact, my T recently told me that she always feels like she's on the edge of losing me. I don't know what she meant exactly. But when I get upset, I do often feel like the only option I have is to walk away.
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In light of what I just said -- maybe T is feeling that you are feeling the urge to walk away. Maybe T's mirror neurons are firing from *your* feelings???
Thanks for reposting the Briere and sharing, and good for you for being committed to the process!
