ncguynva I am sorry for both your wife and yourself. I hope the fact that you see it means that you can get help and change. It is possible. As I said, my father always was a wonderful man, he had a problem with alcohol and once he got help he was an even more awesome father. He had his faults to be sure. You can heal and improve. The cycle can be broken, I'm proof of that. We did all the right things, family therapy the whole nine yards. I don't know why my brother continues the cycle.

I'd like to blame it on the alcohol, but he nearly killed his wife a couple of years ago and was stone cold sober. He was just really offended. His wife cheated on him (not the problem) and lied to him about it right to his face (problem). See in our family a lie is an insult to our intelligence, very offended. I'm sure his military service (also Marine) did not help, when he was in we were fighting with everyone, he was in Lybia, Kuwait, and Somolia (sp). So as you know he's seen and done things that no one should have to see or do.