((((((((((((((((((hangingon))))))))))))))))))))))

I have learned in therapy that we can't keep everything inside forever. I tried that and it made me very sick (physically) and that's what finally led me to find a T.

It is confusing when the things we are upset about happened years and years ago - but if we weren't able to process them then - to talk about them, to feel sad or angry or scared - then they are still sitting there waiting to be processed. It doesn't have anything to do with being an "adult". It has to do with wounds that haven't healed and that need to be treated with tender, loving care.

It sounds like you know what you need - to be able to process things, but to be able to hold yourself together during these last 10 months of school. Talk about your T about how you can do both. Maybe you will need to move a little slower in therapy, or have extra sessions to deal with the big feelings that come up, or learn some coping skills that you can use between sessions.

It DOES get easier over time, I promise. I used to be almost non-functional between appointments when I first started "telling". Now I can go to therapy, fall apart, be little, let T take care of me, and pull myself together enough to be my "normal" self between appointments - and when I CAN'T pull myself together, I have things I can do like call T, or get outside in nature, or watch a silly movie, that help.

Hang in there. This is hard, but you can do it, and you can do it at a pace that YOU can handle.