In the last, oh, decade or so of marriage - I've come to the realization that sex has become a dating ritual. It's something that you use to determine if you're compatible in a physical way which translates to compatibility in a couple-centric way. Just like dancing would let you know if you're compatible sexually. Maybe it's cynical, but maybe more true than you think.

Just saw a really good PBS show about the Bonobo apes. They're closer to humans than Chimps in terms of social bonding and empathy. They do a great job raising their young but are highly sexually promiscuous. They use sex to "say hi" to others. It's virtually impossible to determine who the father of the young are. So, does that remind anyone of the '60s??

Sex has such costs in our society. It's something we all wanted as young (desire to procreate, natural body function). It's something we all pay terribly for if we share it with the wrong people (affairs, breakups, disease). So, it's no wonder we have such fears, taboos and hang-ups over it.

Something my wife and I did when we were dating that helps with the sex hang-ups. We removed body objectivity - by going to a clothing-optional beach from time to time. We both were comfortable with our bodies. It shocked a few neighbors when we told them we did that when we were younger - but it was very liberating. We don't do it now and my wife has developed a lot of hang-ups since then (I don't have them myself, never did). It's probably one of the best things people can do in their lives - if they can get past the taboos associated with it. It's a life lesson everyone should try.