I don't really get it either, but my fiance does the same thing. He's not into anything really "out there", but I understand the hurt, feelings of betrayal, etc. Especially when the girls they seem to want to look at are 20 years younger than us (me).

He has repeatedly lied to me about the porn, cybersex, and even inappropriate "chats" with old girlfriends. Complete with them sending him pics of them in sexy outfits.

He suffers from combat-related PTSD, and I know the men "in the field" escape via whatever media available. Sex sites are common. I can't find it acceptable and am having the same dilemma you are experiencing.

I really love this guy, but the porn is driving me nuts!