Alexandra,

It sure can be scary to start talking about DID in realistic terms as they apply to YOU. Other places and people discuss things in broader terms. There are folks here who have dissociative disorders that are NOT DID as well. One difference I've found is that ppl here tend to be more open about their reality of DID instead of trying to couch it in terms of ego states and such. Most folks here have more severe symptoms than those of ppl who talk of inner children as a vague psych. term.

So yeah I can fully understand how difficult it is to admit this is real, this is happening and this must be faced. No one wants to end up in hospital lost and w/o memory of how one got there.

I'm glad to see that some of yours have been attempting to contact you through journaling. There are many methods to help communication between the parts/alters/circles/levels. Consistant support from trained professional in addition to other support from trusted sources are your best bet to counter the silent ways of surviving all these years.

DID usually thrives on silence for survival. Once that silence is broken often all hell can break loose. Sometimes it is a few days to a few weeks of chaos. Others take longer.

The denial comes in waves. Just ride it out and remember that this dx finally makes some sense of what has been so frustratingly confusing for so many years.

Take care and no worries on how often you post. Taking care of all of you first is priority. See you next time you're around.