Ok - so this is it - I went down the same road as you for different reasons - I took anti-depressants to help with my symptoms and ended up Si and then progressed to having su thoughts - my dr was/is great - she tried another anti-d then suggested I saw a pdoc - I took the new drugs but didnt see the pdoc- they sedated me - but eventually my body got used to them and the thoughts returned - I see a T now who is helping me with those thoughts and feelings - I figure if I can get rid of them I can stop taking any meds - in the meantime _ I have an appt with a pdoc to see if that can help too

I think we need to be open to help from any place that it is offerred - meds alone didnt work for me - its like pressing on a wound - you can stop the bleeding until you take your hand away then it starts again - for me meds are an aid not the cure - my T is helping me find the cure - I hope and I hope you find something that works for you