It's hard to forgive those who are supposed to protect us and love us, especially in situations like this.

My therapist told me that you don't necessarily have to "forgive" those involved... except for yourself. Coming to terms with stuff is hard... and sometimes it's easier to hate a "safe" person rather than someone else... so maybe you're still mad at the person who abused you, but it's safer to be mad with your father first. I know that's the way it is for me... but even if that isn't the case, it takes time to get through the emotional crap to deal with stuff. Me? I hate waiting. But I know it's gotta happen. Right now it sounds like you're trying to rationalize everything rather than feeling it... you're trying to tell yourself "but he wasn't a bad person" but that he still didn't really protect you and validate you for this situation. It's hard... I wish I had the answers to share.