Thanks for sharing your feelings and challenges with everyone and welcome to the forums. I'm a newcomer here as well and I can relate to your post. I deal with persistent feelings of guilt, insecurity, and hopelessness, even when my life looks great from the outside.

<font color="blue"> My best try at being objective... </font>

You are dealing with difficult problems that ANYONE would have a hard time coping with. A pregnant daughter, a less-than-perfect marriage, and a mother who needs care.

As far as I can tell from your posts, you seem to have handled the curveballs that life threw at you pretty well...you take good care of your body, build character, and strive to be positive and happy. You have re-entered school as an adult, you work part-time and you have given your daughter the best life that you were able to. This is all after a shaky start on your adult life. (?)

Your life doesn't sound like my idea of a "sham." Be careful not to discount your triumphs from the past. This looks like another challenge that life has thrown up for you, and you'll probably deal with it just as well as you dealt with the other ones.

I would not beat myself up too much about the choices your daughter made. There aren't any guarantees in the parenting business. All you can do is mantain the kind and compassionate support that you have shown her throughout your life together.

The nauseating feelings...yeah, they are tough. Have you had them before? Some scientists suggest that minor depression is more about habits of thinking than about brain chemistry. (see Martin Seligman's "Learned Optimism: How to Change Your Mind and Your Life")

You sound like a really neat person with lots of cool interests. I hope we get to know you better. Hang in there!