((((Ihateit))))),
I commend both you and your wife for doing everything you can to help yourselves! I hear and see that you care a lot for your family Sometimes my H and I have difficulties stemming from issues from our childhood, and asked him the other day if he would see a T and he said yes. It's a very difficult situation, I know. For me, we both have such diffuse boundaries, that neither one of us knows who's wrong/right or if it's a little of both. I hope your Wife likes CBT. My T is eclectic and does use CBT, but for my PTSD symptoms, I've had to have therapy that digs deeper. But, that's just me. I wish both of you well!