Hi Everyone ---Thank you for all your feedback. So far I've managed to stay safe today. I still have a lot of anxiety regarding my health (both mental and physical). I have a doctor app't tomorrow a.m. I've been sleeping most the day trying to get thru it. I did go so far as to getting a blade out and lightly ran across my wrist, but I did not cut (YET). I am getting a "rush" though just thinking about it. I did check-in with T and told her I have been struggling. We talked about alternatives and contracted for safety. I hope I can do just that. You have a point in that coming here and talking helps to know there are others going thru much the same feelings and the support of one another can help. Thank you all.