v214k....that sounds like a real problem. i know that after my boyfriend and i started having sex he basically quit watching it. he doesnt hide it or anything, tells me what he looks at, what sites he goes to etc... and i told him that as long as it wasnt anything too crazy like depicting rape scenes and such i was fine with it. but after we started having sex hes admitted that hes watched it maybe once. thats how its always been with my exes. they admit to watching it a lot while single but once we got together and eventually started having sex they pretty much quit because they didn't need to anymore. the fact that youre making yourself readily availible and he sayd don't touch me, then you catch him masturbating....that doesnt sound healthy at all. and no, not only sluts want sex. i think id look into that a little more than just saying "it hurts me". sounds like there are much deeper issues here, either with him or with your relationship.

as for getting upset about men watching porn....i think its fine as long as it doesnt show other unhealthy behavior. i consider watching things where women are raped etc... as unhealthy behavior because any guy that can get off to women being beaten...i dont want to be with. or if he watched it 24/7. but just a flick every now and then...thats nothing to get upset about. and i think if thats the case then you need to look at your own self-esteem and why it still bothers you, like ive said before.