((((((((((Blue)))))))) Late 2005-early 2006 I spent 5 weeks in the hospital with acute, extremely severe bone marrow failure. I coded once, had to be resuscitated, on a ventilator, etc. I don't remember very much of it -- friends and family filled me in later -- but one of the only 3 things or so I do remember is having a doctor come sit at the end of my bed and tell me that I was critical and had at best a 50-50 chance to live. There were days that looked overly optimistic, I'm told.

Anyway, here I am. I live with knowing it can return, but so far, so good. I was what you probably would consider elderly at the time (40) -- the survival rates for this particular disease for people that age are slim. But, again, here I am. Jasper's youth is bound to help him just because the younger you are, the quicker and easier your body can heal and fight off stuff. Me, I have no idea what to attribute my survival to.

The sister I'm closest to, who also lives closest to me and so shuttled back and forth while all this was going on, can't even talk about it, 4 years later. My BIL and my friends have told me how traumatic it was for her, and she's even older than me. I can't imagine having to handle it as a kid, either as the patient or the sib.

You and Jasper are in my thoughts. I'm sure he knows you love him. I know it's hard to stay positive when things look so dark. Please keep posting and keep us updated.

Candy