steve, are you seeing a therapist to help you get thru these memories? jme, but i feel it would help you. a T can offer you support and also help you process the pain and hurt you suffered. please let us know how you are doing. we care.   you matter, steve, and are a person of worth and value.
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Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.
The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand
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