OB,  she lives within you.
you can talk to her anytime you wish.
i often do that with both my parents.
i can't explain it but i know they hear me.
i find comfort in that.
how i live my life, i hope, is a living tribute to them.
they are deserving of that from me. 
you can do the same.
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Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.
The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand
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