Hi Lindee,
I care. Reading your letter made me want to immediately tell you so. I fully understand and can feel what you are going through. I am in the same boat; only I have been married for 34 years. I feel alone all the time. Sometimes I even want to get a divorce because he still doesn't understand the pain I am in. Yet, He takes care of everything & me. I am totally dependant on him and worry about what I would do if he left me.
Wish I could be your neighbor because I have no friends. Being isolated and sad all the time isn't very attractive.
Hope to talk again.
Shaudy1
Quote:
Originally Posted by lindee
Just need someone to care.
I feel like I want to explode. Want to tear something up , destoy something, anything. But instead I am imploding. Taking all my rage and turning inside. I am a quiet person but today , actually for a long time, I am a raging maniac. On the inside. I can't sit still but i just want to crawl into a hole. I am not productive. I don't do anything but sit and then up and pace. i am a misfit. I never do anything right.
I have been told all the things that I should be doing to help myself. Including not using the word "should". Have been going to therapy for almost six years. But I just waste it. Why don't I do what I need to do?
I am such a waste of bone and flesh.
I have a husband of 30 years who loves me with all his heart. He would do anything for me but he doesn't know what else to do for me.
Its a bad day.
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