It is a tough situation to be in. I congratulate you for staying with her as it would appear that she needs you most now. So far as I can see, you are doing what you can to help her calm down. But also that her perceptions of you are very real to her - that of not being able to provide for her in the form of a better home, and consequently blaming you for it. One could ask why she isn't equally taking responsibility for "providing a beautiful house". It's not the domain of one person to do it in a relationship. She needs help in getting through this thinking. In the meantime, the problem will continue to be real. Although you may not be able to do much about your income situation right now, you might be able to sit down with her to work out your options. Maybe a house is possible but just not right now, but looking at houses, will give you an idea of what your budget is and what kind of house you are looking for. What things can you do to increase income or to reduce spend...? What timeframe are we looking at? In five years? What plans have you got? etc...etc...It gives both of you something to look forward to. Writing it down helps, pictures in a scrapbook etc...and reviewing it helps as you learn more about housing. This may help alleviate the situation whilst she is not prepared to get help yet....