Hey aquagrl! Welcome to PC!!

Now, I agree with Rhapsody... Slow down and breathe!!
I also worry about pushing my boyfriend away by bringing him down with me. What we're doing is being irrational. It may not seem like it, but it's true! Your boyfriend sounds like a very caring person that isn't going to leave you in the dust. Maybe you should try making a list of all the things you say that are negative in your head about why you think you're pushing him away. Then try to counter them with examples of how he's supportive and caring and isn't going to leave you. You can always ask him to help you with this, and from the little that you've said, it sounds like he'd be willing to do so!

Good luck, and I hope you feel better soon. PM me anytime if you want to talk some more!

Ro