foh do u see a thearpist? there is so much going on in your life right now and your children's lives. i'm sorry about the loss of your husband. this event has certainly triggered even more challenges for you. i'm so glad you posted. we can give you support and know that i do care and that you matter to us. having said that i do believe you would benefit from seeing a therapist to help you untangle all these feelings you have and your boys too. i hope you will keep us posted on how u are doing. hope you will consider my suggestion about therapy. you have so much happening all at once. it can be overwhelming without a support system in place...