Sally, hello and welcome!

Such good advice and I hope it helps you stop beating yourself up...
My own thing is GIGO==Garbage In Garbage Out.
It's a way of getting rid of those head tapes that tell me I'm screwed up in some way. This kind of garbage was dumped on me while growing up.
With the help of my therapist, I visualized that garbage being dumped on me, But I also had the visual of emptying it from my heart...also deflecting it when I felt those old feelings coming back.
It took practice but it works for me.
GIGO

Cap