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Mar 04, 2009, 11:15 AM
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Hi sky dancer,
Welcome to PC! Glad you found us but sorry you had to.
I understand the whole "functioning well" thingy. I used to say to my T if anyone I worked with ever knew what was really going on with me, they would never believe it. I was the hardest working and was highly regarded in my position/s. But that was how I coped. I worked and worked and worked so I didn't have time to look at all the crap.
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Short wrap up--I started having problems on the job--flashbacks, anxiety attacks, depression--what was happening was all that childhood abuse that I thought I'd taken care of was resurfacing in the light of the recent trauma.
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I could've written that with one exception. I hadn't dealt with my childhood abuse. I wouldn't, at the time, even acknowledge it. I kept busy at work and didn't have time to peek behind the curtain.
I was not officially dx'ed with PTSD until I was in my thirties (only after I sought help) and after learning about the symptoms and causes, I can now date the onset back to when I was around nine. I am amazed I lasted as long as I did without help and had my brothers not died, I probably never would've gotten help in the first place.
I really have no words of wisdom or helpful advice, but I wanted you to know I read your story and I hear you. 
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