Well, it sounds confusing, all right.

ok so I answered this and lost it for the 2nd time - maybe..... drat computer gremlins - not really - its me - I pushed the wrong button - maybe thats what I did with the Pdoc?
I wonder if she just wants a stream of patients with simple diagnoses that she can apply a tried and true medication formula to, not someone who is going to be distressed and contact her outside of the monthly visit. I think some of these docs are not comfortable with things like that and just want to focus on symptoms and medications.

She encouraged me to email any questions or if I got distressed so we could answer them at the next appt - when she said I was a challenge she was smiling and said that was good... maybe im not challenging enough???

phoenix, why is it you are visiting the pdoc?

I asked my dr who I trust if I could go off the anti- d's - told her actually - she asked if I still had su/Si thoughts and I said occassionally - so she asked if I would see a pdoc and see if there was a diff med that would help (Avanza used to help me sleep - but since my anniv- the dreams wake me up ) and I said I would - she said shed met this pdoc and she seemed nice

Where did she get your history?

A few days before I nsaw the pdoc their mental health nurse contacted me so she could get a history as thats what they do to save the pdoc time so I said ok - funny thing though she asked all aobut my childhood - then said well its best not to discuss that - childhood stuff needs to be left alone - I told her I wasnt here for that - start of my confusion

Doesn't she know you are in talk therapy?

yep I told her - and re-told her when she asked if i wanted to see a T at her practice - she seemed ok with that

Sounds like she is treating you. Or at least offering medical advice.... If she thinks that what you need is talk therapy and that seeing a pdoc won't help, why does she think you should take anti-Ds?

I dont know - im so confused - maybe cos the history showed that Im still depressed and have occassional SI/SU thoughts - who knows?

Phoenix, I'm sorry you had this bewildering experience. I think it is probably better if you don't see her again. At the very least, it sounds like the two of you don't communicate well, as you left her office with so much confusion about what she was saying and doing.
no, not going back - she said she'd leave the door open (why when she says I dont need a pdoc>) but im closing it

Phoenix, your experience of going to see a pdoc is really different from mine. With mine, we don't talk about the past, about past SI or SA or any of that. We talk about current symptomology and not the origins of the symptoms. The T tries to help with the other stuff. Is it important that you share personal details like those with the pdoc?
what you do is exactly what i expected - I didnt think I would be sharing stuff with her - I thought she would be for meds and my T for therapy
I;m still not sure what she was offering ...... I am going to check back with my dr and take it from there - but I am NOT going back there

I'm sorry you had such a puzzler of an experience with this pdoc. I hope you won't let this deter you from getting the care you need. It just sounds like this was not the right practitioner for you. Maybe your T can help you process what happened.

Good luck.