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thanks Skeksi, I'm glad you found a pdoc that is a good fit - I guess I get frustrated with myself enough wihtout having to be frustrated by not understanding what the pdoc meant - I will see my dr and .... dunno.... will see...
I just cant get from the "we'll have this over in 6 months " to " I/a pdoc cant help you - just keep taking the meds for a year" - guess I just have to try and let it go as something i dont understand and probably never will ....
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Its not how many times you fall down that counts 
its how many times you get back up! 
(Thanks to fenrir for my Picture  )
When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown,
Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly.
by Patrick Overton, author and poet
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